This time last week, we were on a farm in Buffalo Junction, VA, staying in the home where Jordan’s grandmother was born 90 years ago. We were there for our annual family reunion, for time to catch up with people we love, for the chance to unplug, thanks to no phone or internet service whatsoever.
It’s always a really rich time that reminds us of the importance of family and heritage (you can read about last year’s special time here).
One of the highlights of this year’s trip was getting to sit down with our oldest relative, Cousin George (our grandmother’s first cousin), who is 97-years-old and has one of the very sharpest minds. We spent nearly three hours talking about everything from his father’s experience as a slave to what makes for a good marriage, to his perspective on race relations today.
Cousin George speaks with a deep voice, a Southern tongue, a laid back steadiness, and often a very dry humor. He was born on November 19, 1919 in the Averett section of Buffalo Junction, VA. Today he lives in a white farm house one half mile from the place he was born.
Cousin George’s father, Benjamin Sizemore, was born a slave in 1858. When I asked Cousin George what he knew about his father’s time as a slave (before the Emancipation), he explained that since his father died when Cousin George was just 12-years-old, he hadn’t heard many of the stories. But he did know that his father had a brother who was sold to an evil master. And his father did talk about being forced to attend a lynching at the age of nine.
When Benjamin became an adult, he purchased 65 acres of land, which he farmed, and Cousin George’s family never had to work for other people as sharecroppers. This was rare — their farm was located in a tight-knit community of 34 black families who also owned land, which they purchased from George Wharton (a white-looking black man who used his privilege to provide opportunity, independence and self-sufficiency for black families living in the area). As far as money, there was none. But Cousin George would say they were rich in terms of the love in the community.
Cousin George’s mother, Ella, was born in 1878 and worked as a school teacher. She made education a priority, and after attending grade school, Cousin George received a scholarship to attend a trade school in Charleston, WV. After two years, he was called into the Army and spent the next four years in foreign service, mostly in France fighting WWII.Upon returning from the war, he spent two years living in Brooklyn but could never shake the fact that he was “a country boy.” So he moved back to Buffalo Junction and learned how to farm.
It wasn’t long after that Cousin George happened to travel to North Carolina and met a girl named Laura. They fell in love, and with the $18 they had between them, the two married. They never had any children, but the two stayed busy with family, church, and work (Cousin George worked in construction up until he was 90).I was so eager to soak up all that Cousin George has learned from his fascinating life, and I’m sharing just a few of the highlights (the full transcription of the interview is 12 pages!)
On living off the land
“All of this land–65 acres–is where my father farmed. We grew wheat and used the thrashing machine to make flour. We’d take the hulls to feed the hogs, and the straw became our mattresses. We’d milk the cows for milk and to make our own butter. We raised everything we ate. We went to the store only to buy coffee and sugar. It was hard work. And everybody had to work. Children didn’t have any time to play because when you got home, you had to feed the animals, pick up the eggs, chop and bring in the wood for the fire. And the girls would wash the dishes, make the beds, and scrub the floors – we didn’t have this thing you push around (vacuum). We didn’t have money, but we were rich because we had everything we needed. And we would divide everything with all the families in the community.”
On racial tensions in the 1920’s and 1930’s
“I knew people who were killed by whites when they were caught alone. There were only four white families in this area, and they respected us to the highest, because we were really together. No one bothered us, because we didn’t have telephones, but we had pony express, and in a few minutes everyone knew what was happening. When I was a teenager, they were doing a lot of lynching all over, but I never felt scared because all of us boys had a gun. But we didn’t bring them home, we had them hidden around the grounds, because our mothers wouldn’t allow it.”
On fighting in a segregated army
“I made sergeant and led the fire department. Our boys were smart, but we didn’t interact with whites until we were overseas. I’m gonna tell you the truth, I didn’t feel all that proud to be fighting in the army. I feel a little different now, but back then, we would run into problems with white soldiers even as we were fighting on the same side.”
On race relations in America today
“I wonder about our country. Even though we’re worried about North Korea and all this type of stuff, if you look back at our history, are we an example? What have we done? Even though we’re making progress as a black race, segregation is still at its best. It’s easy to talk, but our actions say different.”
On 58 years of marriage
“I find that married life is sweet. But you know, starting off, it’s the prettiest thing you’ve ever seen, but when you’ve been married awhile, the road gets kind of on the bumpy side. The tiger breaks out in the woman, and the elephant comes out in the man. But you can’t just get up and leave, you’ve got to learn each other and work that thing out. Ask your spouse, ‘What do you lack?’ And then decide to do the thing to please your spouse. My wife used to love to fish, and I despised going fishing. She didn’t like baseball, but she used to follow me when I played. The reason why there’s so much divorce these days is because we don’t have time to talk. We’ve got to have more patience and understanding. My wife and I had our rounds, but we learned each other.”
On trying hate
“I learned how to hate one time, when I was 22-years-old. But it didn’t last but a year, because that’s the most miserable life I’ve ever had. When you hate, what actually happens is you’re miserable, and you want the whole world to join you in what you’re doing. But it doesn’t work that way. You can’t sleep at night. So I found out, I don’t care what people say about me as long as I do right, I’m gonna have myself a ball, and while you hate me, you’ll be the one to suffer the consequence. I had to fight to not be angry about racism, but I’d overpower it by going to the Book. Most of the times before we get in trouble, there’s a voice that tells you not to get into the trouble. And then another that says “Go ahead.” I try to always listen to the first voice.”
On the secret to living to 97.
“Is there a secret? No. People always say what they did to live longer, and it’s not that. It’s just the Lord’s grace and mercy. Because if it were for my goodness, I wouldn’t be here. However, I don’t let old age bother me. The only reason age bothers people is because they want to stay here, but they want to stay young. It won’t work that way. As you grow in grace, knowledge and understanding, you have to face the facts of life. I can’t do what I used to, and I don’t want to. You don’t go to the same places, and you don’t have to. I don’t see anything wrong with it, because people who are young, they have pain. I don’t worry about my pain. Everything wears out, you know. The only thing with old age is that you have to continue to learn. And most of what I learned wasn’t in school; it was from observing people in the world.”
On being the original minimalist
“People today want too much. And you already got what you need and more than what you need, and we buy just to buy. I see these guys with 5-6 cars – you can’t drive but one. If you got 20 suits, you can’t wear but one at a time. I met a guy who had 8 or 10 white shirts, and I didn’t have but one. And mine was just as clean as his. I’d take mine home, wash it, iron it, and wear it again. It’s not what you have, it’s how you act with what you have. And I’ve been broke so long, it’s…it’s beautiful. As long as I can pay my bills, I’m satisfied.”
On what he’s most proud of in his life
“The woman I married.”
On following Jesus
“I try to live a clean life and that’s rough. See, you think you’re doing alright until you get into the Good Book, and you find out you’re so far behind. There’s so much we think we have right. I remember one day when I was going to church with Momma. And there was a man laying on the road drunk, and so Momma stopped the car and we took the guy home. I said, ‘I thought you were going to church, Momma?’ And Momma said, ‘Why should I go to church and let this man lay in the road and die?’ And I think about this type of thing. Sometimes we put on our little zoot suits and think we’ve got it made, but there’s something in the world that needs to be done. Children need to be fed. People are hungry. People need some clothes. We let clothes we don’t even know we’ve got rot up in our closets. I ain’t seen inside your closets either, but I know I’m speaking the truth. And people are in need.
That’s what makes being a Christian so tough. We like to say we love everyone. But we should stop saying that if we don’t mean it. Some people say, ‘I never lie.’ Most Christians lie in the church, not outside the church. They say, ‘I hate that guy who sings in the choir with me.’ And then both of them sing, ‘Oh, how I love Jesus.’ How can you say those two things? We don’t realize it’s a lie. And that’s why I’m careful how I pick my song. If you say you’re a Christian, you’ve got to strive to follow Jesus. Otherwise, if you’re going out of business, take down your sign.”
57 Comments
Erinn D
August 24, 2017 at 9:56 amWhat an amazing interview! It’s such a blessing to have a family member that age, they’ve lived so much and have so much knowledge to offer. Glad you interviewed him, I just may read the entire interview :-)
Jessica Rice
August 25, 2017 at 3:55 pm:-) Thanks, Erinn!
Portia
August 24, 2017 at 10:01 amWhat a wise conversation, thanks so much for sharing Jess! <3
Jessica Rice
August 25, 2017 at 3:56 pmThanks, Portia!
Tee
August 27, 2017 at 1:18 pmWhat a remarkable story. I can easily see this interview being thr segway to a mini bio about the life and times of Cousin George! Thanks for reminding us of the importance of our elders. Thry are not to be ticked away but celebrated!
Jessica Rice
August 29, 2017 at 10:02 amThanks for reading, Tee!
Cara
August 24, 2017 at 10:39 amSo happy I took the few moments to read this! Thank you so much for sharing… thank you to cuz for sharing…. truly my blessing to read it
Jessica Rice
August 25, 2017 at 3:56 pmThanks for ready, Cara! :-)
Dacia M. Adams
August 24, 2017 at 10:48 amSuch a great interview With Uncle George he is such a blessing to so many people. And his wife was such a beautiful and loving woman .
Jessica Rice
August 25, 2017 at 3:56 pmYes, I heard amazing things about his wife as well. I wish I’d had the chance to meet her.
Christine Amorose
August 24, 2017 at 10:55 amI loved this! So much wisdom, and seems like he has a lot of joy in him too <3
Jessica Rice
August 25, 2017 at 3:57 pmHe certainly does! He’s a treasure for our family.
Shakirah
August 24, 2017 at 1:01 pmThis was such an incredible interview. Thank you for sharing it with us. I am going to revisit it many times as your uncle shared some serious gems.
His reflections on following Jesus hit me to my core. Also I loved what he was most proud of: his wife.
Jessica Rice
August 25, 2017 at 3:57 pmThanks, Shakirah! He was dropping bombs!
Kristina
August 24, 2017 at 2:17 pmFeeling reinspired. Thanks for sharing. WOW.WOW
Jessica Rice
August 25, 2017 at 3:58 pmThanks! :-)
Cecilia Shand Wilson
August 24, 2017 at 4:02 pmWow what an inspiring interview thank you for sharing this with us and I want to read more! I loved his advice in marriage and about having to let go of uncomfortably with hate. Where can I find the rest I’m sure Cousin George had more to say. My advice- this could be your first book told with lots of love ❤️. Thank you and Cousin George for this.
Jessica Rice
August 25, 2017 at 3:58 pmYou’re right about there being enough for a book! Thanks for sharing your thoughts on it, Ma!
MaRice
August 24, 2017 at 11:05 pmI devoured every syllable of this post, Jess – your finest ever! You captured the wit and wisdom of Cousin George so well; I’m proud of both of you!
Jessica Rice
August 25, 2017 at 3:59 pmThanks, Ma! It was a privilege to sit and hear so much from him.
Christina
August 25, 2017 at 5:14 amThis was so so good, Jessica. Thanks for sharing! This line is my favorite: “I’ve been broke so long, it’s…it’s beautiful.”
Jessica Rice
August 25, 2017 at 3:59 pmThanks, Christina! Yes, I love that line too! So much to reflect on.
Joann
August 25, 2017 at 7:45 amMy gooooodness, the tenderness and wisdom in your conversation with Cousin George.. and how I needed to read it!! Such beauty and delight! Keep these coming..
Jessica Rice
August 25, 2017 at 4:00 pmThanks, sis!
Renee
August 25, 2017 at 9:08 amI agree that this is good starter for a great book. So much of current influx of communications is today-centered and self-centric, and what we need is the perspective of history and the wisdom of our elders! We need to listen more and never stop seeking to learn….even when we are 97! Thanks for listening to Cousin George and carefully crafting his story into a helpful post. Love it.
Jessica Rice
August 25, 2017 at 4:01 pmAmen to more listening! And I love that there’s so much we can learn from “everyday people,” as opposed to the celebrities we tend to focus on. Thanks for reading and sharing your thoughts, Renee!
Brittany
August 25, 2017 at 10:04 amThis is awesome. I have a great uncle who is turning 90 in October and you’ve inspired me to do something similar with him.
Jessica Rice
August 25, 2017 at 4:01 pmYay! That’s wonderful.
Shirley Rogers
August 25, 2017 at 11:27 amWhat a beautiful interview that’s full of wisdom. This is a true trailblazer who has contributed to paving the way for us all. This story is such a rich legacy for the family, the community and the church.
Jessica Rice
August 25, 2017 at 4:01 pmSo true! Thanks for reading :-)
Tonia p
August 25, 2017 at 3:40 pmThank you so much for sharing this story! I love hearing stories about how our ancestors lived in the old days. Very inspiring! I grew up in Red Oak, Va, just down the road from Buffalo Junction.
Jessica Rice
August 25, 2017 at 4:02 pmHearing these stories really is amazing. So glad you found it inspiring.
Chantal
August 25, 2017 at 6:43 pmI love it! “Pretty soon the tiger comes out of the woman, and the elephant comes out of the man…” absolutely priceless! Thanks Jess, I’m going to remember that truth! – and I’ll be chuckling and thinking of Cousin George every time my tiger comes out!
Brandi Davis
August 25, 2017 at 9:01 pmI loved this! This is what makes our world and lives special. Thank you for sharing.
Taylor Banks
August 26, 2017 at 8:06 amI just love Mr. Sizemore. I used to be scared of him when I was young going to the union lol. He was just a big , tall & stern man lol. To be able to have this type of conversation with him at this age, is amazing. This is the type of conversation that I yurned for from my Bigma before she went home back in April. She was 98 and would be 99 in December this year. People are by far blessed to have folks like Mr. Sizemore in their families. He should have visitors at his house all the time lol. Too God be the Glory for all the great things he has done to watch over him all these years! Great interview!
Johnsie Thomas
August 26, 2017 at 8:36 amThank you for sharing your exciting memos with us. I really enjoyed the interview with Uncle George. I have been inspired. Continue to make us proud. God bless!
Jessica Rice
August 29, 2017 at 10:04 amThank you, Johnsie. God bless you too!
Melissa Clay Worthy
August 26, 2017 at 10:12 amMr. Sizemore was my first Sunday school teacher and his beautiful wife cooked at the elementary school and loved on me everyday. Their love has touched so many, and I’m privileged to have experienced them both. A beautiful piece for a wonderful legacy.
Jessica Rice
August 29, 2017 at 10:04 amAmazing! Thanks for sharing your memories, Melissa.
Nell Sydnor-Waugh
August 26, 2017 at 1:06 pmThis is so awesome! His words are so rich and true.
Ricky Pines
August 26, 2017 at 6:45 pmI loved this !! It brought back so many memories. I truly love Cousin George. He taught me soooo much. He was my beloved Sunday school teacher. He guided me in all kinds of things!! I will never, ever forget him. He helped make me a man. God bless him!!!
Jessica Rice
August 29, 2017 at 10:03 amAmen, cuz! He has quite the legacy!
Brian Jennings
August 27, 2017 at 9:45 amFantastic. Thanks to you and Cousin George.
Jessica Rice
August 29, 2017 at 10:02 amThanks, Brian!
Kathy Martin
August 27, 2017 at 12:36 pmWhat a special set of memories! Thank you for sharing! I also grew up in Buffalo Junction and appreciate hearing this wise man’s perspective.
Jessica Rice
August 29, 2017 at 10:02 amBuffalo Junction has a special place in our family’s heart. Thanks for reading!
GABBY CARTER
August 27, 2017 at 5:24 pmI enjoyed reading the article.Mr.George is a man full of wisdom that we can all learn and benefit from.
Gloria D. Smith
August 28, 2017 at 6:06 amI remember Mr. Sizemore from the Bluestone Harmony Convention each year when he would have us sing together in the choir. I remember his beautiful voice and his wisdom. He was so loving and kind. Mrs. Sizemore was such a good cook. They made a great couple! Thanks for sharing a portion of his bio. Good material for a book! Such inspiration for us all!
Ashley D. Johnson
August 28, 2017 at 5:15 pmThanks for sharing. Such Pearls! Loved to hear him sing that Bass line. Not just a low voice, but a great Bass! Helped me appreciate my voice when I thought I should be singing Tenor. I remember Mrs. Sizemore also, who helped keep us well fed at Hillcrest!
Jessica Rice
August 29, 2017 at 10:01 amYes, such a great voice! Thanks for sharing your memories, Ashley.
Elizabeth Speed
August 28, 2017 at 10:50 pmYour Cousin George is a family treasure! So much wisdom and family lore is a wonderful thing for your family. Find out all you can from him of the elders and their lives because it’s a beautiful history.
I grew up on the border of Charlotte & Prince Edward countries, went to school in Charlotte County & graduated from Randolph Henry High School so am very familiar with this area. My daddy would take us Sunday driving & go all the way down to Lunenburg & Mecklenburg countries down to the state line and around. That was a great treat for us all.
Thelma
August 29, 2017 at 6:20 pmLoved this interview…Mr.Sizemore is such a humble man and joyful too. His wisdom comes from living and loving all these years. Continue to be blessed!
Rae
December 31, 2017 at 3:47 pmWow! Such a blessing. And it’s amazing how your husband looks almost exactly like him!
I wish I could have had these type of conversations with my grandmother before she passed. And with my mom before she passed. It’s so important to know our history and it hear it first hand since society has been making it a point to write our history for us.
Thank you for sharing!!
Olney
August 21, 2018 at 7:07 amAmazing story!!! So rich. He really put a lot into perspective and it was so simple some of the things he said! Loved it
Liselle Coker
September 24, 2020 at 12:42 amI LOVE listening to really old people. They’ve been through so much! Thank you for bringing his story to us!
Marc Wagner
November 19, 2020 at 10:33 pmHappy 101st Birthday Deacon George Sizemore!
Al Underwood
January 8, 2021 at 7:35 pmThank you very much! What a noble man, a role model for everyone today. May the Lord continue to bless Mr Sizemore abundantly, above anything he can aak or even imagine…Ephesians 3:20,21